Our Adoption Journey
by Aaron Phillips
My wife Jeanette and I had 3 wonderful children.
We had daughters Madeline and Morgan who were 10 years old, and a son Andrew
who was 4. We had decided that we wanted to have a 4th child, but were
reluctant to go through the fertility process again, which we had to do for the
other 3 children.
We were at a meeting for my company in California and met with a couple that had adopted two children. They went on to tell us their story of why they decided to adopt. It was a very moving story and both Jeanette and I had tears in our eyes throughout most of it. The husband pulled me off to the side and explained how he was very unsure of the adoption because of the financial costs, but told me it was one of the best decisions he had ever made.
That night when we got back to our hotel room, Jeanette and I decided this is what we were meant to do. There was a reason that God had us talk with them. We had an interest in the culture of China, so we decided that’s where we were going to adopt a baby girl from. We started looking up adoption agencies, sent inquiries to a few, and decided to go with Hand in Hand in Minnesota.
We were at a meeting for my company in California and met with a couple that had adopted two children. They went on to tell us their story of why they decided to adopt. It was a very moving story and both Jeanette and I had tears in our eyes throughout most of it. The husband pulled me off to the side and explained how he was very unsure of the adoption because of the financial costs, but told me it was one of the best decisions he had ever made.
That night when we got back to our hotel room, Jeanette and I decided this is what we were meant to do. There was a reason that God had us talk with them. We had an interest in the culture of China, so we decided that’s where we were going to adopt a baby girl from. We started looking up adoption agencies, sent inquiries to a few, and decided to go with Hand in Hand in Minnesota.
The main reason we decided to go with Hand in
Hand is because of Karin. She was our adoption coordinator and was nothing
short of amazing. She explained everything and made us more prepared that we
could have ever imagined. Everything was taken care of for us and all we had to
worry about was caring for our new baby girl.
We submitted all the paperwork, took all the mandatory classes, and then
waited, and waited, and waited. The waiting was by far the hardest part, at
least for Jeanette it was. For me it was figuring out the financial side of
things. I had no idea how we were going to afford adopting a child from China. Jeanette kept telling me that it was meant to
be and that it would all work out. I didn't believe her and kept stressing out
about how we were going to pay for everything. I should have just listened to
Jeanette, as both of our parents supported us tremendously and helped pay for
the adoption. Jeanette knew that our little girl was over in China just waiting
for her forever family. She knew in her heart that everything would fall into
place to bring her home.
We had one more major decision to make during
the adoption process. Adopting from China can be a very long process, as the
waiting period for a healthy baby is several years. We never really thought
about adopting a special needs baby because with three other kids, we didn’t
want the extra work it would entail. Jeanette made the decision to sign up for
the special needs program, which she did on a Friday without my knowledge! The
next Monday, I was in Colorado for work and got the most amazing call I’ve ever
had in my life. Jeanette was crying and said, “We have a baby girl”. Well as
you can imagine, I was beside myself. The first thing that went through my head
is how did this happen? We were supposed to have at least 3 years before we
were matched with a baby girl. Jeanette then went on to inform me that she
signed us up for the special needs program and we were matched pretty much
right away. I had so many feelings going through my head: excitement,
disbelief, and of course STRESS! We were going to have a few years to save up
our money and now all of a sudden this was happening now! Again, I can’t thank
our parents enough for helping up bring our baby girl home. I also can’t thank
Karin enough for knowing this was our baby girl and she was meant to join our
family. I called Karin and couldn’t even talk to her because I was so
emotional. We were matched! Our baby girl was coming home to her forever
family.
I am not saying that a special needs child is
for everyone, but you have to listen to your heart. Your heart will tell you
what the right thing is to do. If I would have listened to all the voices in my
head saying it won’t work, we would have missed out on bringing home our baby
girl. It was very hard for me to understand how, but Jeanette knew this was our
baby girl. Women have the mother’s intuition and just know when their baby is
waiting for them.
This was the most amazing and most emotional
journey I have ever been on. The only people that can really understand what
this journey is like are the people that go through it. We not only brought
home our daughter, but we changed a life for the better. Actually, we have changed
several lives because Faith is such an amazing person who has already touched
so many of our family and friends.
Was it an easy journey? No it wasn't.
Has it been perfect since she has been home? No it hasn't.
Was it the best decision I have ever made and would I do it
all over again? Absolutely.Has it been perfect since she has been home? No it hasn't.
If anyone wants to
contact us and ask us questions, we would love to help other parents bring home
their children.
Japhillips5@msn.com
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For more information about the Hand In Hand China special needs programs, contact Indiana@hihiadopt.org
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